I have a bit of a problem.

I'm getting to the point where I'm ready to start working out again, but I'm not quite there yet. This is what I look like when I've been standing up for about an hour...

Still, it's infinitely better than this...

Which is how I've spent the past few days.

So it's been a bit quiet on the workout front, I don't have much to report. I climbed the stairs outside of my flat today - whoo! Those last three steps are a killer, but today it didn't take me 5 minutes ;)

I also wiped my motorcycle down, removing all of the cobwebs and dust from her and I made sure she started! One of the kids round here has taken it upon himself to unplug my indicators, turn them round, pull one of the indicators off of the join, flick my kill switch, unplug an earth wire and jam wood chip in my ignition; so I also got some exercise walking round to his flat and *kindly* requesting that his mother refrain from letting him do whatever he likes. Or she can pay the bills. Either way.

And that sums up the excitement for the day!

Almost.

Today is a week since Dave the cat went on his diet! Having been told by my sister that my cat actually weighs MORE than her one year old child, it's been a real thought provoking time for Dave.... So it was on to the scales with him today - a week after the calorie-restricted diet commenced. I interviewed him on how he is getting on with the low-calorie diet. This is how he feels about the whole enterprise.

Don't worry. I'm as sane as I've ever been. Dave and I often have conversations - he has quite a developed view on the Ukraine situation at the moment....

Aaaanyway. How is Dave the cat doing? I'm proud to report that he has lost 0.4Ibs since his last weigh in! (unlike his mummy....). He didn't seem too pleased when I told him that, all I got was a "rowouulllee", which I believe means "feed me now, or I'll scalp you whilst you sleep".

As I write this, there is a war of wills currently going on. Dave has taken his pet balloon Wilma, and placed her inside his empty bowl. The bowl has also been moved into the centre of the kitchen, so that we cannot miss it....and as I turned around I got the death stare.

Think he's trying to tell me something?

Well, I finally dragged myself out of bed. Granted it was because I'm RAVENOUS, but still, it's out of bed right....!

I made it to pole last night. I think it's a sign of the depth of my addiction.....either that or just the depth of my stupidity, but I made it there. Ok, so maybe spinning round the pole twice was actually too much exertion, but hey, at least I could stand ;)

So, good day all. I hope everyone is having a fantastic Wednesday! I'm currently working my way through a lot of food, many episodes of Arrow and lots of sleep in an attempt to recover from what can only be described as the most amazing thing I've ever done in my life at the weekend.

I still can't really process the size of what we accomplished this weekend. We hiked, continuously, for nearly 30 hours. It's beyond my processing capabilities!

I've had loads of people asking what is was like? how did it feel? how did you do it? So here goes :D

The course took us 29 hours and 17 minutes to complete, we lost two team members along it (not literally) and we hiked in 28°C+ temperatures during the day. It was a slog at points, but it was all totally worth it - so let me tell you the full story :)

At 6am on Saturday, Snailstalkers set off from Queen Elizabeth Park. We'd gone to bed at around 10:30pm on Friday and had woken up at 3:30am on Saturday ready for Kenny, our support team lead, to take us down to the start line. Arriving at 5:00am there was enough time to set everything up, leave several things in the car that Kenny had to run back (I blame the distraction of the flapjacks personally) and get and eat plenty. Amber and Simon somehow managed to eat TWO sets of breakfast!

And of course, there were plenty of photos to take! You'll see George, my pink pony in several photos - he naturally had to be included so that I was continuing to #sweatpink for my SPA sisters ;)

It was warm already at 6am, we should have known really. I was just holding out hope that we wouldn't end up being rained on too much, but of course, what Mother Nature had in store for us was equally as testing. I'm still grateful that it was dealing with just one type of weather really, last year we baked in the sun all day only to have torrential downpours on us overnight!

From the start to checkpoint one was fairly simple, it was warm and everyone was sweaty, but we made good time for the stage and got into the swing of walking. Poor Tash had started the day feeling really poorly, but she made a good effort to get into the walk as best she could. We came into CP1 in 1:51. Nicely done team. Time to sit, eat, change socks and get moving!

The only thing was, we all knew what was coming...

I shan't repeat what we affectionately named this hill, simply because I don't use that kind of language here ;) but these photos really don't do it justice, it's a bit like climbing a cliff face at certain points, but you know, the view from the top is almost worth it.....!

From checkpoint 1-4 there were no real incidences, Simon, who had been dealing with a bum knee for a while now was in a lot of pain, but bravely pushed on as long as he could. Eventually at CP4 he went over on the ankle of the same leg and tore a tendon in the front of his ankle. At that point it was game over for him, the bruising and swelling even two days later really show how painful it must have been.

Naturally he was gutted to have to come out, we'd all trained for so long, so hard that it seems like you lose a little bit of yourself when you have to withdraw, but it made sense and luckily we now had Simon to help out on the support team to give them an extra pair of hands!

As we pushed on to CP5 the sun was really beginning to take its toll on people. We'd been talking to other groups as they went along - several people had minor sunstroke, there were lots of blisters on the course now and everyone was getting a bit tired. We'd been walking for 10 hours by the time we set off to climb the second largest hill on the course. At this point, Tash's damaged ligament in her ankle made itself known. There's no way I know how she got up that hill, but again, the view was breathtaking at the top. Or maybe that was just the ascent ;)

This event really tests people. It brings out the strength in them and shows their true grit. So many people push themselves so hard through the course when they're injured or ill, and Tash was one of those people. By CP5 she had some serious damage to her already damaged ankle and was into the depths of advanced dehydration.

In 28°C weather it's not just about drinking enough, we'd all had roughly 5 or 6 litres of water by 50km in but you also have to make sure that you're balancing electrolytes. As you drink more, you sweat, and as you sweat, you lose a lot of essential salts from your body. Most of the team ate those back through salty crisps, peanuts, squeezy cheese (mmmmm, cheeeeeeese) but Tash, having felt poorly to start hadn't eaten enough. At CP5 the paramedics told her she was not fit to continue.

The flame was for me and Amber to take on now.


Amber and I decided that at 50km, we would be finishing this event. So we continued. It was heartbreaking to leave Tash and Simon behind in that field, but we knew that we both had a darn good chance of making it for the team. We even managed to make some new friends and trade some Hula-Hoops for a Glo-stick. Seriously, the Hula-Hoops saved our lives :p

When you've been under constant physical strain for a long period of time, by this point we were 13 hours in, we were simply not interested in eating. Eating was only a means to an end and I know for both of us, every time we ate there was a slight nausea attached to it. Don't worry, SO not the case now ;)

When we met our support team at cp6, there had been a lot of wondering whether we'd make it, wondering whether we could eat any more and a LOT of emotional outbursts. Fatigue makes you do funny things and every time we saw supporters, Gurkha's, our support team or anyone who said anything nice there was a bit of blubbering. What can I say, it's an emotional roller-coaster and everyone is SO nice and SO supportive *hiccups* Ah you guys.

Between cp6 and 7, Amber didn't think she was going to make it. She told me she'd have to drop out at CP8. I told her to wait till we got there.

At CP8 there was a large bunny, who gave us stones that were painted by his children with one word to make us feel better. I got "strength" whilst Amber got "hope". Amber got up and left CP8 and carried on walking. What an utter star.

I'm not going to lie here, CP8-10 was the hardest thing I've ever done. CP8-9 was actually a 13.8km stage of the course and it felt it. At this point we were beyond fatigued, we discussed the word "knackered" in reference to how we felt and decided it didn't ACTUALLY cover what we were feeling. We'd been walking for 23 hours now, we'd not had a proper meal since the start as neither of us could keep any amount of food down and we were dead tired.

This is where my squeezy cheese came in. Squeezy cheese helped me......a small dollop every 10 minutes kept me salted and with something in my system to help me continue. Amber turned her nose up at the squeezy cheese. More for me ;)

There were several points where we sat down to adjust shoes/socks/go to the bushes (I don't recommend bush-weeing when you've been using your legs for 20+ hours fyi - it's almost impossible to squat which leads you to sit on whatever is on the floor. In my case, this was a nettle bush *sob*) and we almost nodded off right there on the trail. Luckily though, it was light, the sun was out and we could see other teams looking EXACTLY as we felt and pushing on through it. That was inspiration enough.

Just before CP9 I did consider stopping. I know, I know. It seems stupid, but I WAS delirious. Naturally when we got to the CP stopping wasn't an option. With 10k to go we had to do it, and we had to do it in time.

So, beyond-knackered, aching everywhere, hot, hungry and almost out of time we pushed through CP9 to complete the course with 43 minutes left. The last stage took us 2:26 minutes, we power walked the first part of the stage giving us enough time to comfortably stumble the last 6km.

It's strange psychology, but that last 10k could have been 100k for all it felt like - it seemed to take forever. The last 3km felt like the whole course all over again - it stretched out into eternity, until eventually, we could see it. We could see the end......WE HAD DONE IT!!

I can't imagine how it must have felt for Simon, or for Tash, who had set her heart on 100km to see us cross that finish line. I'd like to think that she felt proud, that she knew we'd done it partially because we couldn't let her down, but all the same, it must have been gutting to see something you wanted to achieve happening in front of you.

At the point of crossing that line though, there was so much noise, so much commotion, people shouting, cheering us on, us being announced as we crossed the line, cameras snapping. For two people who'd been awake a LONG time, it was overwhelming. I hope the people that came to support us at the finish line know how deeply thankful we both were for their support, for the cheering, for the celebration of our success. It felt amazing. Nothing I have experienced has felt like crossing that line and finally sitting down, knowing that we don't have to walk anymore!

So, the THANKS I have to say here!

HUGE thanks to the walkers - Amber, you really are amazing; Tash - your progress has been exceptional, just like you - don't be sad, you helped us make it; Simon - you rock, I saw how much it cost you.

MASSIVE thanks to our support: Kenny - thank you :D You were amazing, well done as support team lead; Lynn Reynolds - you stayed up way later than you ever thought and were still amazing, great job; And Amy Nightingale - you made all the difference at CP6, that bagel really helped and the green tea - great idea :D

And then thank you to everyone who has supported us and sponsored us! The list is still growing in sponsors, but you guys are amazing and you make the pain worth it :)

Another short one tonight guys, but I thought I'd update you!

We did it!

It took us 29 hours and 17 minutes, but we did it!

Amber and I crossed the finish line at 11:17am Sunday morning, having walked since 6am Saturday. We crossed the finish line as a two-woman crew of total awesomeness!

We lost two team members along the way - one who still is unable to walk on their injured foot and the other who ended up in the medical tent with a recommendation from the paramedics that she had to come out or risk serious illness.

Those two achieved 40km and 50km respectively and they walked on through pain, sickness with pure willpower pushing them on. It was admirable and we were glad of the company to the 50km checkpoint! Having spent 1 hour and 15 minutes at CP5 though, Amber and I were pushed to make back the time.

We did however finish the last leg in 2:26 - the first stage (from CP9-9.5) in 40 minutes - the 12 hour recommendation being 56 minutes! The second stage in 1:46 which was under the 24 hour recommendation (of 1:52). Amazing job Amber :)

I'm totally fried still to be honest so I'm going to leave it there. We're pleased as punch, if not a little sore ;)

If you haven't donated yet and do have some pennies to spare, please please do sponsor us - we're doing this all for Oxfam and the amazing Gurkhas - make our blisters worth it :)

https://www.justgiving.com/Michelle-Reynolds4/

Thank you to everyone who HAS donated: Lewis, Nicky, Pepe, Ian, Ron, Jean and a few anonymous donors! That's just on my part!! SO massive thanks for the support all :D

I'll leave you with this though - it felt amazing :D (the Gurkha's were SO amazing, friendly and supportive. What an event!!)

Now I'm off back to bed ;)

Just a short one today.

In about an hour and 30 minutes Simon and I will be heading off to pick up Tash and Amber so we can register for the event tomorrow.

We're then going to have a BBQ, kick back, eat loads of pasta and prepare psychologically for the event.

At 6am tomorrow morning, we'll be at the start line, ready to walk for the next 28hours or so.

We have spent hours in training, over 400km have been covered in training.

At the moment I'm scared, nervous, excited, worried, excited..... ;) all in equal measure. Our main concern of course is blistering. I've had some pretty nasty blisters - both during last years event and once in training (only once). So here's hoping we finally cracked the blister care!

We've put so much into this event, training, fundraising, planning - it's all going to be done with in another 72 hours. How strange is that?

If you haven't sponsored us - please please do. We're not at our fundraising target yet and we need all the help we can get.

My Justgiving page is https://www.justgiving.com/Michelle-Reynolds4/

You can follow our progress through the course on our Trailwalker Facebook page (separate from my Diary of a Pole Addict main page) and we'll be posting up pics as we go!

I won't be posting in the next couple of days - be good and keep up the good work!

I'm now going to go outside and I may be some time...

I'm tapering.

It actually hurts.

You know, it's sort of funny. You initially look forward to the taper. "Ah", you think, "I've worked hard for months, finally I can settle down, get some R&R before the big event."

Yah.

It doesn't work like that. I am aching all over from where my muscles are used to being taken for a spin every day. Light stretching isn't covering it, I have to say.

So I'm taking my mind off of things.

I realised today that my cat is REALLY overweight. In fact, lets pull up the cat-weight calculator I used.

Now I *know* there is an "every body is beautiful" movement going on out there and whilst I don't disagree with it, I do think it skates over the inevitable truth. Overweight bodies are generally in a worse state of repair than those in a healthy range.

Yes, yes, I know about the anomalies. Large amounts of muscle, really fit but overweight, but I'm talking general population here.

It's harder on your joints, heart, lungs....anyone who has been there knows the feeling. How it feels like climbing Everest to get up one flight of stairs (yes, I know it still feels like that after legs day but I'm talking EVERY set of stairs), sweating for no good reason, puffed out walking from one room to the next.

And now my fur baby is in the same boat. It's time for change! Dave is going on a calorie controlled diet.

He's allowed 290kcal-324kcal a day, so 100g of his cat food will put him in at 290ish kcal/day.

He's 6 hours in and not too happy.

That is where he's been since I explained his new regime to him...

Even the oven repair guy took one look at him and said "well, that's one fat cat".

C'mon Dave, look happier, we're going to get your sexy back ;)

Here are the first of his progress pictures:
15.8Ibs, 5years 6months, male.

I didn't tell you guys ALL about pole this week! What an oversight on my part ;)

This week we had Robyn instructing us, and I gave her one requirement: it cannot bruise the back of my knee.

Granted, it's not on the back of my knee, but OW!

Still, thanks for sparing the crease of my knee Robyn - love you xD

The "Spin with no Name" aka the "Post Spin" was my focus this week. Lets see how I did....

Well. Better than last weeks...

Charlie came over during my torturous attempts at the start of the lesson and asked me why I was looking at my feet.

"Looking at my feet?"

Yep. Apparently I'd been staring down at my feet, which naturally made me curl in on myself so I had less space to get that foot through. Looking ahead made a huge improvement! Now it's time to really polish that off and getting it looking good :D

Robyn, taking my request regarding my knee very seriously got me doing a spin we'd been doing for a while. But this time, I was doing it BETTER. Bigger. Way more fun xD

She then tried to dislocate my shoulder.....the "pretzel" spin is GORGEOUS and Robyn is so amazingly flexible, but it usually ended in me sitting on my arse looking confused xD Still, it's one to work on - reverse grab and outside leg onto the pole. Maybe not one for this Tuesday when I'm going to be stiffer than that loaf of bread I left open last Monday.

And that is what I'm talkin' bout :) (video taken from Erindalebutterfly's channel - looking good lady :) ). So yeah, you basically have to dislocate your shoulder, back, hip..... :p

Now, you know about the "Pink Shorts of Power". Meet the "Pink Shorts of Awesomeness"....

I'm in the business of expanding my neon hotpant collection. It's neon green next, but I found these on Tuesday in town and couldn't resist xD

PINK!! :D

Right, well anyway. Pole rocks, not sure about these bruises though ;)

Remember guys, tomorrow we're setting off to Queen Elizabeth Park nr Portsmouth to register and get ready to walk our 100km in aid of Oxfam and the Gurkhas. If you haven't sponsored us and can spare a few pennies, please do!!

Other than that, I'm over and out! Night all :)

I should never have bought those Starburst....

As I sit post-pole at my computer desk, trying desperately to think of something witty and poignant to say these Starburst are going INTO MY BELLY.

Ooops.

Starburst are my nemesis....

Just going to be a short one tonight folks, thought I'd stop in to say hi - how is everyone? ;)

I'm currently in the process of tapering. Now, tapering may have an official definition, but to me, tapering means climbing the walls and tapping things. The Starburst may or may not be helping in that regard!!

I couldn't help myself but go for a run this morning when Tom asked if I wanted to. Like a cat to a dripping tap, I was drawn in. I'm *trying* not to kick/hit/thump/smack/accidentally catch/drop something on/bend/crack/go over on/bruise my feet at the moment.

I cannot say I've been successful. When Simon asked me if I was going to pole tonight, I automatically answered "of course!". I got the look.

I *tried* really hard not to do anything to bruise my feet or legs but it's just not possible....and though I may not think this 70km in, totally worth it :P

Tomorrow I'll be doing some yoga and a little walk to school, but after that I'm facing a two days of nothing. Nothing. What am I going to do with myself? Doubtless you'll all find out :P

Anyway ladies and gents, just checking in. I thought I'd leave you with this though to brighten up your day since we're on a yoga theme ;)

Good day all! I'm writing this from my phone, courtesy of a power cut, but I couldn't leave you all with nothing ;)

Yesterday I was speaking about progress and how I felt about my body in terms of psychological effects - and it got me thinking. What progress have I actually made in the last 6-7 months?

Here are the comparison photos. The top left photo is the oldest, from around January, the bottom right photos are from today. I'm fairly pleased :D

This was 6-7 months, 1920 calories 5 days a week, 2400 calories 2 days a week. Exercise calories not eaten back aside from days where the overall burn from cardio is above 800 (as measured by my HRM).

I eat a vegetarian (ovo-lacto) diet, with the macros set for 40% carbs, 30% fat, 30% protein.

weight change in these photos is +5Ibs from start to now.

I workout 6 days a week, with 1 "rest" day with light exercise (e.g gentle yoga, nice walk) and one with total rest (light stretching at most). I typically weight train 4xweek, pole 1xweek (now 3xfortnight) and I swim 20mins 3xweek (morning) (this schedule had changed slightly with the training for the walk with 1 weight session and 1 swim being given to hiking!). I'll be reviewing my routine after the hike also :)

I have to admit to being amused by top right to bottom right....I was so proud of them at that stage too, shows it's all a work in progress ey :) I finally got me some baby guns!! :D

Soon I'll be prancing around in crop tops....just like I promised my sisters several months ago. Now I just have about 10% body fat to lose ;)

So do you guys have similar success stories? I love hearing people's stories or do you have any good ideas for my new workout routine - what do you do? Let me know, I <3 comments :D

Anyway, time for me to go and eat and watch another episode of "Arrow" (which is amazeballs btw) AND he does all of his own stunts (thanks for that Tash ;))

Be good and keep clicking peeps :D

Today something MAJOR happened.

I took a step towards stopping myself bullying me!

Let me explain. It's REALLY hot here in the South of the UK at the moment. I'm too hot to mess about. I didn't want to wear my 3/4 length shorts because they're too hot - I wanted to wear hot-pants and I'm disinclined to acquiesce to my constant fear of what people might think (*gosh how could they think?!*) with our high-twenties temps (laugh all you like my American friends, it's hot for here :p).

For years I've told myself my legs are too fat. People will look at me (why does that even matter?!).

This is what I look like in hotpants.

Not too bad right? You're probably wondering what on earth the fuss was about. Let me explain - Looking at the photos, I don't see myself, I see a stranger. I can see she's not too badly built, maybe carrying a little extra weight, but it doesn't look awful. You wouldn't second glance it.

But inside my head....I don't look like that.

Let me describe what inner Michelle looks like.

She's 5'6ish, 200Ibs. Her thighs look like downed tree trunks, you know - the big old oaks, the kind of tree it takes a real storm to pull up. Her stomach is gross, like a big bag of goo stuck onto the front of her body. Her boobs are all over the place and she has a stupid dorky face with her top teeth that overhang...

It's weird the pictures we build for ourselves isn't it. I can see the girl in the picture. She's alright looking. In fact, she looks fairly slim. If we're being bitchy we can say theres a bit of weight on the stomach and thighs but she's alright really.

Today marks the first time I stopped myself from beating on myself.

Don't get me wrong, it took a HUGE force of will.

I dressed in hot-pants ready to go to the gym. When I got outside I could see my thighs jiggling with every step, the fat bouncing against my other leg and undulating back across. I felt like with every step a tsunami was happening on my thighs. I had to go back and change. I almost cried. I looked awful, how could I still be so fat?

I made hubs turn the car around and let me go back into the flat to change. I even went back into the house and stood in front of the mirror for about 5 minutes. Willing myself to look different, willing myself to accept me, willing myself to change.

With a feeling of intense triumph warring against blind panic, I turned myself away from the mirror and left the house dressed exactly as I'd come back in when I'd been intending to change.

With one last "tell me honestly, am I too fat for these?" to hubs, I sat myself back in the car and with no elaboration here, had tears in my eyes - from fear, from panic, from feeling like something major had just happened.

I FORCED myself to walk through the lobby, into the gym and workout with hot-pants on.

No one even second glanced me. Well, except from the kiddie who was lifting a good 15kg less than I was on the incline-flyes, but I'm going to guess that wasn't because of my gym attire.

Maybe this sounds totally crazy to you. I know other people couldn't care less what I look like. And in reality it's not really them I care about, it's my OWN opinion of myself that has to change. That's really the root of the issue here.

Maybe you understand me word for word. Maybe you are working up to the same thing I've just done. All I have to say to you, whether you are a sister or a brother is - you look amazing. Don't let yourself tell you any different.

And if anyone else says anything negative to you, remember, it's them - not you. Normal people don't go around trying to make other people feel bad about themselves.